God, Please Save These Troubled States

The one event I most looked forward to at Comic-Con was meeting Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett, the voices of Tom Servo and Crow on one of my favorite shows of all time, Mystery Science Theatre 3000. To my delight, these two hilarious fellas are back (with Mike Nelson!) with The Film Crew, a show in which they continue to riff some of the worst films ever made.

Sitting in a swanky hotel room at the Horton Grand, I had a good 20 minute conversation about MST3K, favorite comedians, Flint Ironstag, and the future of riffing films.

Continued from Part I.....


Mark: So I know you initially started off [and] did…well, I guess you were a stuntsman and you did stunts for “The Water Boy”?

Molale: My first ever job in Hollywood was doing football stunts on the set of “The Waterboy.”

Mark: So how did you make the transition from doing just stunts to having speaking roles in movies?

Molale: It was just like everybody else starts out. I also started out as a non-union extra just like everybody else. 99.99% of everyone in the business starts out that way. That’s what you start out as.

I moved to Los Angeles in ’98 and I didn’t plan on being an actor. I fell into to it because of my abilities as a football player and an athlete. I met some people and they said they’re doing this movie called, “The Waterboy,” and you’re perfect for this movie. Here’s the casting people. Get in touch with them, tell them we recommended you. Next thing you know, I’m working on this movie. So I discovered, “Wow. Here’s this industry I know nothing about.” So it was interesting to me, because I’m one of the only people who didn’t move to L.A. to get into acting. If you would have asked me 10 years ago if I’d be doing this, I would have never said I would be an actor. But now, this is what I do! And I very humbly blessed to do this because, A) I love it and B) I think the athlete in me…I’ve pushed myself mentally and physically playing football for so many years that…this is a challenging business!

Mark: Right.

Molale: So I think that competitive drive to keep going and going…well, it helps me to survive in this industry.

Mark: Yeah, I know what you mean. I ran track and cross country in high school and you develop a sort of mental endurance doing those kind of physical sports. It translates well to other things.

Molale: Absolutely. You’ve got to be a jack of all trades and hopefully, you can master something along the way. You know, getting back to your first question, the transition from being a stuntman…well, I never really was a stuntman!

Mark: So it was more of a one-time thing?

Molale: No, I’ve done a lot of physical work in my career as an actor. A lot of the stunt coordinators know me as a guy who’s very physical and I can do dialogue really well. They say, “Well, we know Brandon and he’s a great actor. He can take a punch and he can throw a punch and we don’t have to worry about Brandon. We don’t have to train anybody.”  A lot of times, there’s a lot of parts out there where whenever there’s something physical, production has to get a double for them. So they bypass everyone and go right to me. I’m all all-for-one deal.

Mark: There’s no need for anyone else!

Molale: I mean, the guys from Reno [911] hit me with a car! And that’s really me, not someone else. That’s what makes me unique.

Mark: Meeting you…well, you’re a big guy. Even taller than I expected. A lot of the roles that you’ve been given have been specifically because of your physical stature. Do you ever feel that you’re unfortunately typecast…for only physical roles? Would you like to break free from that? Or are you comfortable with it?

Molale: I fight that stereotype all the time. It can frustrate me at times. Because the people look at me, or they’ve seen me for my bodywork, and [they say], “Oh, Brandon, he’s a big bouncer type,” or, “We’re going to consider him for the meathead or the jock,” or whatnot. People don’t know I’ve worked on Shakespeare, I’ve worked on…one of my favorite playwrights is John Patrick Schandling, I’ve worked on his material. People don’t see that because casting, a lot of times, unfortunately is jaded and they have their set ways.

There’s some 6’4”, 6’5” actors who do comedy, as well as other things, and I’m not going to let other people tell me what I can and can’t do.

Mark: That’s a good mentality to have.

Molale: And I want to play Captain Marvel in Shazam!

Mark: That’s actually my next question. Tell me about Shazam!


Molale: Well, I’m flattered that they’re considering me and Duane [The Rock Johnson] for this part. I want to play Captain Marvel.

Mark: I mean, there’s no denying your resemblance to him.

Molale: Ha, let’s quote you on that. I totally agree. If there’s ever any superhero that Brandon Molale looks like, it’s Captain Marvel!

Mark: Before we go, one last question, favorite Motorhead song?

Molale: THE ACES OF SPAAADDDESSS!!

Balls of Fury is out August 31.

That's pronounced, "MO-LOLL-EE." I had to ask too.

Brandon Molale, best known for his role as Kevin Ward in "Mr. Deeds," (as well as some GREAT parts in Reno 9-11 and Dodgeball), sat down with me amidst the chaos of Comic-Con 2007 to speak with me about Balls of Fury, Captain Marvel, football, and Motorhead.


Mark: So this is Mark Oshiro, with Buzznet, and I’m here with Brandon Molale. We’re doing an interview here in the middle of the hall at Comic-Con on the second floor. So, the first thing that I wanted to ask you was about your experience at Comic-Con. Is this your first time you’ve been here?

Brandon Molale: This is my first time here as an industry person. I was here before and just came as a spectator, but this is an amazing thing to be at.

Mark: Awesome. So what have you been doing while you’re here?

Molale: I’ve been on my feet entirely way too much. I mean, there’s so much to cover here—

Mark: Yeah.

Molale: You know, I’m a big fan. I’ve always been a big fan of movies and comic books and television. You know, I grew up and I was a big Batman fan, the original, with Burt Ward [as] Batman.

Mark: Very nice!

Molale: But, but…I grew up in the early 80s, so G.I. Joe and Transformers were cartoons I used to watch. I used to collect G.I. Joe comic books, Gru, The Wanderer…

Mark: Man, taking me back!

Molale: So, it was cool to see…

Mark: Wait, I have to ask. Have you seen the new Michael Bay Transformers?

Molale: I have not seen it yet.

Mark: Beforehand, are you more on the camp that thinks, “I don’t think he should make this”? Or, as some of the shirts say downstairs, “[Michael Bay] raped my childhood”? Or are you totally for a modern version of that?

Molale: You know, everybody has a different take on everything. So, if someone’s willing to put out the millions of dollars it costs now to make the movie, I don’t have a problem with them remaking it. If they put me in it, that’s even better.

Mark: There you go! Michael Bay, listen up.

Molale: I actually auditioned for the Transformers.

Mark: Really?

Molale: Yeah, yeah. I didn’t get hired, but that’s how it is in my business. I go out for a lot of stuff and I’m so used to… you hear, “NO” so much that you get used to it. So just for me to be able to audition for a project, that’s where it is and…God bless them when they put me in anything!

Mark: Exactly.

Molale: Because I like to work.

Mark: Well, on the flipside, for things you have been approved for, I noticed you have a few new projects coming up. I know beforehand we’d talking about Balls of Flurry. [Pause.] Balls of Flurry?? I mean Balls of Fury. But you’re doing a voice for “The Spectacular Spiderman”?

Molale: [Looks at me with a wholly blank expression.]

Mark: It’s on your Wikipedia. Some Spiderman project.

Molale: I don’t know about that one! Maybe my agent tapped into that one.

Mark: Weird! It says under your Filmography credits that in 2008 you’ll be doing a voice over for a Spiderman project.

Molale: Well, they’ve got me somewhere in 2008 for “Shazam.”

Mark: Right.

Molale: But I don’t know about Spiderman. Like I said, my agent deals with all that, so he’d know a little more about that than me. All I do is come in and sign the deal.

Mark: Well, we were talking about Balls of Fury and…how excited are you for that movie to come out? And exactly when does it come out?


Molale: It comes out August 31st on Rogue Pictures. Tom Lennon, Ben Garant, the guys from Reno 911. As you know them, Dangle and Junior. It’s Christopher Walken. [He] plays a guy named “Fang” whose…he’s a crooked gentleman who runs a to-the-death ping-pong tournament and the CIA—

Mark: It’s such an absurd idea.

Molale: Oh yeah! I love it. The CIA, which is led by George Lopez, has to infiltrate into Fang’s evil lair and there’s Dan Fogler, who you’re gonna see Dan in “Fanboys,” which is coming out through a friend of mine, with Kyle Newman directing. You might actually see me in the reshoots of that. So I’m crossing my fingers because I am a HUUUGGGEEE Star Wars fan. I’m still talking to Kyle about that.

But really, who doesn’t like to see a movie….just like Dodgeball. [Brandon starred as “Blazer” in Dodgeball]. Who doesn’t like to see people get hit by balls?

Mark: Exactly. Physical comedy works that way.

Molale: Yeah, and these are smaller balls and all, but people are still getting whacked and it’s always entertaining.

Mark: Out of every…I mean, you’ve worked on a lot of projects, from TV to movies. What would you say is your favorite cast you’ve worked with out of all of them?

Molale: I’d have to say…hmm….I’d have to say Dodgeball. It was so much fun to go out there everyday and get paid to whack people in the face with balls…You know, I played football for 12 years. So, to go and do something I love, as an actor, portraying characters, especially these guys…I mean, we were the bad guys on that team. It was fun! Everybody booed us and we just had so much fun shooting. So it was definitely Dodgeball.


Click here to read Part II!

And, if so, I'll be in jail about a week after the law is enacted.



xkcd: The answer to all of life's problems.

I had to sit through the Stargate: Atlantis panel in order to get a good spot. (Dead center, 8 rows from the front.) It actually wasn't that bad, as the actors were pretty witty.

Anyway, there will be only two presentations during the Dimension Films panel: Rob Zombie's remake of Halloween and the film adaptation of Stephen King's The Mist, as directed by Frank Darabont.

Rob Zombie rules. "The Mist" is my all-time favorite short story from Stephen King, so the next 90 minutes should be completely spectacular. Keep refreshing your browser!

2:33 PM: That same annoying announcer from yesterday is the emcee for Ballroom 20. Sigh. She thinks she is so witty. Newsflash: This is not so.

2:39 PM: The world premiere of the Halloween trailer!!!! Ah, this is so exciting. As already stated, the movie is more about the origins of Michael Myers. Everything that’s being shown right now is pretty brutal. Rob Zombie isn’t fooling around; you can tell this is going to be a movie that’s meant to scare the daylights out of you.

2:41 PM: Rob Zombie comes on stage to “Living Dead Girl” and hundreds of people are on their feet, cheering him on and giving him a standing ovation. Rob tells us we’ll get an exclusive full clip lter in the panel. Sheri Moon Zombie is also on the panel.

2:54 PM: The clip from the movie has started. Michael Myers is dragging a lifeless body across the floor; we see a couple of people in hiding, grimacing. They know they’re going to be found. Man, Michael Myers looks GREAT and totally convincing. He knows there is a young girl hiding in the room. She can see him through a hole in the wall. He looks around, but then he leaves. The two women breathe a sigh of relief. But he hears something. He returns to the room and you can hear his heavy breathing through the mask. He kicks through a wall just behind where the girl is hiding; she’s not there. He is angry that he’s made a mistake.

Bah. Sorry. I was just asked to close my laptop AGAIN. What is wrong with these dudes? Anyway, the scene gets really intense; the female character is hiding in the ceiling while Michael Myers is breaking out the panels up above. Rad.

3:03 PM: There will be a live Rob Zombie album this year and Rob will go on tour by the end of the year!

3:13 PM: Rob Zombie and company are leaving the stage. “The Mist’ is next!!!!!

3:16 PM: A lot of people left after Rob Zombie. I’ve moved up to the 5th row. They’ve set up signs for Frank Darabont and Thomas Jane for the panel.

3:20 PM: Laurie Holden and Marcia Gay Harding are also here for the panel.

3:24 PM: They just showed the clip of the scene where Norm opens the garage and the first attack happens. The mist looks GREAT GREAT GREAT. The scene was absolutely terrifying. I could not be more excited.

3:28 PM: Marcia Gay Harding will be playing Mrs. Carmodie, the crazy religious zealot in the supermarket. She says the film has a large “Lord of the Flies” element to it.

3:30 PM: Laurie Holden will be playing Amanda, whom Thomas Jane’s character has an affair with. The film, to her, is a morality tale: The animals in the store are more frightening than what’s outside in the mist.

3:43 PM: They’re showing another clip from the film. AHHHHH I AM SO EXCITED!!!

First thing that I need to point out is how spectacular the cinematography is. The cameras drift in and out of the actors; in many ways, it feels and looks like it’s being shot as a documentary. The acting is TERRIFIC. I have a lot of hope that this movie will be critically acclaimed. (A horror movie needs this.)

4:00 PM: Awesome. They’re talking about the relation between Stephen King and H.P. Lovecraft. Excellent.

I just stood in a line that was, at the very least, a half mile long. I hope to never stand in a line of that magnitude for the rest of my life.

Anyway, this panel/screening will be showing clips from The Invasion, One Missed Call, Whiteout, Get Smart (with Steve Carell!!!), and Zach Snyder's Watchmen.

10:28 AM: Finally, I'm actually sitting next to decent, tolerable people. And I smell peanut butter. This should be disconcerting, but I am pleased.

10:39 AM: Oh man, I just made new friends. Elizabeth and Jenny. AWESOME. They live in LA!!!!

10:43 AM: They’re showing the trailer for Get Smart. I love Steve Carell so so so so so so much. So far, it’s hysterical. I’m definitely going to see this. OH MAN, SOMEONE JUST GOT HIT BY A BUS. Masi Oka is in the movie, as well as The Rock, Rob Courdry, and Anne Hathaway.

10:47 AM: Special guests are arriving to be on the panel! Masi Oka (Heroes) is here! Han Dividian (Borat’s friend) and Duane “The Rock” Johnson is here too. Holy hell, I think I have a new crush. STEVE CARELL IS HERE!!!!!!!!!!


10:53 AM: Steve Carell is gushing at the chance to play Maxwell Smart. It’s very endearing.

10:59 AM: Some girl just asked The Rock how much he can bench press. He responded, “How much do you weigh?”

11:01 AM: Steve was asked more about the next season of The Office. 13 episodes have already been written, but he has no idea what the plotlines are.

They’re showing a clip from Nicole Kidman, since she’s shooting Austrialia with Baz Luhrman. She is going to star in The Invasion, produced by Joel Silver and starring Daniel Craig and Jeremy Northern.

Now they’re showing a trailer. Holy crap, this already looks fantastic. The alien transformation is creepy; it appears their faces melt over. Gnarly.

11:08 AM: I’ve been asked to close my laptop twice now. They think I’m recording it. Are you serious? Do you think I’m recording the image that reflects off of my face?

They’ve shown the trailer for One Missed Call, a remake of a Takashi Miike film. There are some disturbing images, but I didn’t really like it. Shannon Sossaman and Ed Burns. Shannon is kind of an airhead. Someone just asked Shannon about Mr. Show. She said she had a crush on David Cross. As she should!

HOLY CRAP. EVERYONE WHO ASKED A QUESTION GOT A NEW iPHONE!!!!!

11:15 AM: We just saw the trailer for 10,000 B.C. Looks incredibly non-historic. The trailer for Whiteout (movie from the graphic novel.) Joel Silver (the producer) and Kate Beckinsale are both on the panel to discuss the movie. The images we saw in the trailer were pretty damn gnarly; I don’t think they’ll show the clips we saw, since some were a bit gory.

11:28 AM: They just showed the Whiteout trailer again. I’m pretty stoked for this movie.

11:35 AM: Kate Beckinsale just arrived. She was stuck in traffic. Wow, she’s really, really pretty.

11:38 AM: Kate was asked about the difference between acting in an action film and a psychological murder mystery. She initially replied that she had to sleep with the director far less. (She then said “I’ve been stuck behind a train!”)

11:43 AM: We’re being shown a trailer for a movie called “Trick R Treat.” It looks incredibly stupid. Really really stupid. I think Anna Paquin is in it.

Zach Snyder is taking the stage to discuss Watchman! He got a long bout of applause.

11:56 AM: Watchman is going to be rated R, which is rare for the genre. Someone yelled out, “Blade!” when Zach asked if there were any other R-rated superhero movies. Zach replied, “Blade? Really?”

12:01 PM: Zach is excited and satisfied with the cast because there are no real “superstars” in the movie. He isn’t worried because 300 did well without any real stars as well. Unfortunately, the “surprise” cast was leaked yesterday, stealing some of his thunder.

12:09 PM: Panel is winding down. I'm heading over to the Exhibition Hall to take hundreds of photos and videos for y'all!

I've been here for over an hour. Even with all that advance preparation, I'm about halfway back in this giant room and off to the left side. The announcer is so annoying. She also needs to be thrown off that imaginary cliff I mentioned in my last blog.

Anyway, the LOST panel starts in one minute! I'll keep you guys updated on every juicy tidbit they give us.

5:02 PM: They’re not going to start until every seat is taken. I hate life.

5:06 PM: UGH. She’s doing that stupid thing where she asks if we’re ready and if it’s not super loud, she’s making us do it again. I HATE YOU, ANNOUNCER WOMAN.

Finally. It’s starting.

5:09 PM: Ok, it’s not actually starting. But the announcer made a warning that there will be a surprise at the end that may make a mess? Or take up a lot of time? I didn’t exactly understand it.

5:11 PM: Now it’s actually starting. They’re starting with clips from the past few seasons, including bits of interviews with various cast members and crew members. Different pockets of people cheer when their favorite character shows up.

They’re showing a segment on The Others.

5:13 PM: Whatever is “coming next” is WORSE than The Others!!!! They apparently weren’t the bad guys?

5:14 PM: Damon Lindeloff and Carlton Cuse have taken the stage. None of their mics work. Excellent. They’re about to show a clip with early renderings for the LOST video game, to be released in February 2008.

5:16 PM: Video game preview is on screen now. Characters actually look pretty realistic. It appears there are a ton of puzzles to solve, as well as some great action sequences. Good quality.

5:18 PM: Game will have a “flashback” element and also have things we never saw in the show. They moved on pretty quickly, though, to talk about the show. Cuse and Lindeloff are slightly drunk and have brought a fail-safe plan to prevent themselves from saying too much. (Bells.) Lindeloff sounds excited and pleased that they definitively have an end to the show.

5:22 PM: Q&A has begun! Cuse and Lindeloff both state that we can say what we please to them. First question: There was a lot of violence in Season 3. What is the context of all the violence? Were The Others ACTUALLY the good guys?

Cuse answers that they wanted The Others to be a large focus of Season 3. There needed to be a final showdown WITH a bodycount. But Lindeloff says that in Season 1, the Losties were actually more violent, just prettier.

5:28 PM: Where is Michael? Is that story line dead?

Cuse: Harold Perrineau will be back on the show this coming season! So Michael will be back in Season 4. They won’t say how or when.

5:30 PM: Will we see any more flash-forward scenes?

Cuse: Yes. Going forward, the show will feature flash backs AND flash forwards. Lindeloff says we’ll be pleasantly surprised HOW FAR in the future the show will go.

5:32 PM: Will Jack and Claire find out they are brother and sister?

Damon Lindeloff starts to answer, but Cuse rings him out. Damon nods yes! They will find out in Season 4.

Next question: Will we see more of the Dharma Initiative in Season 4?

Cuse: We may be learning more about Dharma at 5:58PM!!! What will happen then? Cuse is rung out. No answer!!! DAMMIT.

5:34 PM: There are no plans to run any re-runs during the off season. Season 3 DVD will be out on December 11th.

5:36 PM: Did Ben actually manipulate the balloon crash? Did he kill Henry Gale?

Damon says he did NOT actually try to get caught in Rousseau’s trap. They’ll reveal exactly why he was traveling across the island when he got trapped in season 4.

5:40 PM: What happened at the end of Season 3 is NOT the end of the show. It does NOT end with Jack and Kate. There is an entire chapter that is told off the island. But they felt they could only have that type of ending once they had announced that there was a definite end to the show.

5:42 PM: A fan states that she thinks it’s unfair that we don’t know enough about Michael coming back. Is it just going to be in a flashback or will he really be on the island?

AND THEN HAROLD PERRINEAU COMES OUT ON STAGE! MICHAEL IS BACK!!!!

5:44 PM: Damon says Michael leaving was actually part of a deliberate scheme and plot plan. NOT an accident. Harold says he’s excited to come back! Damon says he will rejoin as a REGULAR castmember, not just a small, bit-part.

5:47 PM: Richard Alpert, the guy who never ages, is an awesome character, comments one fan. But the actor who plays him has other commitments, so it’s going to be hard to tie him into the show. He then asks what the title is for the first episode for season 4. There is no official one, unfortunately.

5:53 PM: Someone asks, “What questions are we not asking that we should be?” Lots of laughter. Cuse says, “Who’s in the coffin?” RING RING RING RING. Harold guesses that it's Locke.

5:55 PM: Now they’re just teasing us by asking all the questions we want answered, but not answering them. I hate them.

5:56 PM: When Hurley sees someone fall off a building in Season 1, was it Locke? No, they all answer.

Another person asks about Libby. Will we get more of her?

Cuse: It is our intention to complete the Libby story this year. Also, some of the online theories regarding her aren’t false.

Will Rousseau be getting a flashback?

Soon, answers Cuse. Not sure when. Damon says there are INTEGRAL elements to her story…then he is interrupted and not allowed to finish.

6:00 PM: Apparently, the first 10 episode summaries are online somewhere???????

6:01 PM: Monster question: Radzinsky and Kelvin both referred to the monster as Cerebus, but Damon just says that is only what they called it. The question evolves into asking about if the monster was a force of judgment.

Damon: What the monster did, who made it, and what motivates it to do what it does will be definitely answered. No timeline given. They do have an answer, and they believe it is satisfying. No “Sopranos” ending either!

6:04 PM: We’re being shown an exclusive clip about the Dharma Initiative. BRAND NEW. Never seen before. Cuse said the film was found in a building in Norway and was sent to them. They’ve “restored” the film the best they could.

6:06 PM: Cuse and Lindeloff thank us and walk off stage as the film clip starts. Shows Dr. Edgar getting preparted for the film that was made and appeared in the hatch. He is holding a bunny with the number 15. The Orchid Station: This is a training tape for station 6. Hahahahaha. This is hilarious. It’s like a blooper real.

But it appears there is a sixth Dharma Station!!!!!!!!

The panel is over. I've got to pee and find my friends here. It's time for a night on the town in San Diego! This is my last event of the day. Tomorrow will be nuts!

I'll post my photos and videos later tonight.

Sweet Lord. $12.95 a day for wireless? GAH.

I'm sitting dead center, 9 rows back from the front row in Hall H at ComicCon. The panel begins in 30 minutes. The schedule of events are:

-Beowulf
-Hot Rod
-The Spiderwick Chronicles
-Iron Man
-Indiana Jones 4
-Star Trek
-Cloverfield/1-18-08 (with JJ Abrams)

I'll be updating this blog throughout the panel for the next couple hours!

1:04 PM: The guys sitting behind me are singing their favorite songs from The Chorus Line and making terrible jokes about bananas. Shoot me.

1:06 PM: The guy sitting next to me is wearing a bright blue shirt with a smiling giraffe on it. It says, in large bright letters above it, “DEEP THROAT.” About 85% of everything he says is a terrible pun that is sexual in nature. Find me a cliff to throw him off of.

1:14 PM: They're showing promotional clips for Wonder Con, San Francisco's version of this very event. Neat!

1:24 PM: I'm getting antsy. I started standing in line around 11:00am; I missed two panels this morning because, once I saw the line to get into Hall H, I knew that if I even wanted to get inside, I'd have to wait a long time. For about 90 minutes, I stood outside in the sun. I luckily brought my iPod, so Darkest Hour, Bad Religion, The Smashing Pumpkins, and Chuck Ragan provided me some slight comfort from the heat.

I have a Slusho! shirt now. Sweet.

1:31 PM: Turns out there was an empty seat next to me. I am now in the most uncomfortable position I've ever been in. Let's just say the guy next to me should be sitting in two seats.

OH FUCK THEY'RE STARTING!!!!!

1:35 PM: Going through the motions. Lots of introductions, thanks, warning messages, blah blah blah. GET TO THE TRAILERS!

1:39 PM: Andy Samberg is on stage to promote Hot Rod.

1:42 PM: Showing clips from Hot Rod. Andy Samberg is dancing in the forest to the greatest song ever. Survivor? Some terrible late 80s pop song. Excellent.

1:50 PM: They’re discussing the origins of “Dick in A Box.” Gross grandma jokes ensued.

1:52 PM: Neil Gaiman is coming out to discuss Stardust!!! So is the screen writer, Jane Goldman. They're about to show an exclusive clip from the film. I'm stoked!

1:55 PM: Michelle Pfeiffer is in a movie again??? What the hell? Anyway, so far, Stardust looks gorgeous. Some pretty impressive special effects.

1:58 PM: Michelle Pfeiffer’s character is giving the main character a massage. But she calls it a “MASS-SAGE.”  Silly accents!

2:00 PM: The dramatic music behind this trailer is driving me insane. Who ever heard of a 5 minute scene that is constantly one long bit of tension? Oh damn, Michelle Pfeiffer just slit someone’s throat. And a unicorn just head-butted a goat? I’m totally lost now.

2:04 PM: Gaiman says that the movie encompasses about 80% of the book. Robert de Niro’s role was expanded PRIOR to him actually signing on to the movie, but Jane Goldman said it was a “delicious” prospect to work with de Niro, so they wrote more of him into the script.

Gaiman insists that he would rather there be no “Sandman” movie made rather than a bad one. However, he thinks the time is arriving closer than ever to possibly make one. It will take someone someone like Peter Jackson or Sam Raimi to be faithful to the book and “steamroll through hundreds of millions of dollars” in order to make a good movie.

2:10 PM: The Beowulf presentation is beginning! Neil Gaiman and Roger Avery have taken the stage and OH MAN, I am stoked to see what they’ve done with the epic poem. (Which is wonderful.) Exclusive footage is being shown at the Horton Plaza tonight at 5PM and 6PM. Roger Avery said that the 3-D version will make you feel like you’ve come down off of acid. There was an awkward silence for a few seconds.

2:15 PM: Gaiman and Avery shared that their “wishlist” for the cast and were excited that NO ONE turned down their role!  In addition, there will be 3 versions of the movie shown as well: Flatscreen, 2-D, and 3-D. 3-D IMAX!!!!!

2:19 PM: The world premiere of the Beowulf trailer!!!!! OH MAN. THIS LOOKS ABSOLUTELY AMAZING. I have goosebumps.

2:22 PM: The Sweeney Todd panel is taking the stage right now. There is no exclusive clips, but everyone in the room gets an exclusive movie poster. The artwork is fantastic. Johnny Depp looks completely evil.

2:24 PM: OH LORD. They're showing the trailer for 1-18-08. The whole crowd just erupted with joy.

2:25 PM: JJ Abrams is onstage!!!!!!!  He said he wants a great monster movie for so long. He was in Japan over a year ago with his son, who dragged him to all these toy stores. He realized we needed our own monster that rivaled Godzilla. In the coming months, we’ll get the real trailer, the real title, and real clips from the movie.

We’ll all be receiving these amazing movie posters with a beheaded Statue of Liberty.

So 1-18-08 is NOT called Cloverfield or Slusho! It will be an American monster movie and will NOT be a monster that has existed before. NOT Cthulhu. NOT Godzilla. NOT Voltron. An entirely ORIGINAL creature!

2:31 PM: The Spiderwick Chronicles is supposed to be the “Jurassic Park” for fairies and goblins. They’re discussing the creation of the creatures for the movie and showing sketches of the animals.

2:37 PM: The goblins for The Spiderwick Chronicles look fantastic. There is one called a “Red Cap,” meaning he dips his cap in the blood of the human he’s just killed. Rad!

2:46 PM: The Spiderwick Chronicles trailer rules. I can’t believe Nickelodeon is making it. Super creepy and dark.

2:48 PM: They’re showing the trailer for Drillbit Taylor, the new Owen Wilson movie. A group of kids bullied in school hire Owen Wilson to protect them, thinking he’s a Navy Seal. He’s actually homeless. Judd Apatow is involved, somehow. It looks hilarious.

2:52 PM: John Favreau is making a surprise appearance to discuss Iron Man.

2:54 PM: Exclusive footage of Iron Man! Robert Downey, Jr. is in it. He looks pretty sleazy. But holy crap, this movie is going to rule. The Iron Man suit looks a bit bulky to me. But someone just shot at it and it ricocheted back and killed the dude.

OH WAIT. THE FULL IRON MAIN SUIT IS RIDICULOUS!!!!!! HOLY CRAP!!!!! WOW. That looks GREAT.

2:59 PM: Steven Speilberg is doing a live feed from the set of Indiana Jones 4! They bleeped out when he said the name of the new movie. Ha! Harrison Ford is there too. And he looks great! I can’t believe there’s going to be another movie.

Ray Winstone is on screen too. He will be Indiana’s sidekick for the film. Shia Labouf is also there as well. Wow, he’s getting old. Marion Ravenwood is back!!!!

3:04 PM: I didn’t know Damon Lindeloff and JJ Abrams were working on the next Star Trek movie. They’re onstage now. Is it weird that I find Damon Lindeloff strangely attractive?

Oh, I guess JJ Abrams IS directing it.

Spock is going to be played by Zachary Quinto from Heroes! OH MAN! Sylar is Spock????

3:10 PM: JJ Abrams announces that Leonard Nimoy will ALSO being playing Spock. I assume as….an older Spock??

3:17 PM: Panel is over! Rushing upstairs to Ballroom 20 to get a good spot for the LOST Season 4 Panel!!!

I'm at my friend Shana's house, stealing wireless from a neighbor. (UP DA PUNX!)

THERE WERE SO MANY PEOPLE AT THE CONVENTION CENTER! I was completely blown away by the sheer number of people hanging out, walking by, running to meet schedules, and getting a sneak peak at the events for the next 4 days.

I'll be at Comic Con tomorrow just after 10AM. I want to get a head start, check out a few exhibits, and get an idea of the size of the place. Are you going? Email me (markedge@buzznet.com) and I'll find a way to meet up with you and do a video interview.

I need to get some sleep. I've got a lot of walking to do tomorrow. And I get to find out about 1-18-08 and Season 4 of LOST. I need all the energy I can get.

OH AND PS: I JUST GOT AN EMAIL OFFERING AN INTERVIEW WITH HENRY ROLLINS. YES, PLZ. KTHXBAI.

In about 24 hours, I'll be leaving the office to head down to beautiful San Diego to cover the 2007 Comic-Con festivities.

What will I be doing whilst parading about the Convention Center? To give you an idea, here's my tentative schedule as of today:


THURSDAY, JULY 26TH
*11:00 - 12:00: Spike TV’s Scream Awards
*12:30 - 1:30: GoComics: Rise of Mobile Comic Books
*1:30 - 3:30: Paramount Pictures/Dreamworks/Nickelodeon Previews (Beowulf, Hot Rod, Iron Man, Indiana Jones, JJ Abrams/Cloverfield)
*3:45 - 5:15: Lionsgate Films (Jessica Alba, Dane Cook, David Moreau, Clive Barker, Tobin Bell, SAW IV)
*5:00 – 6:30: LOST Season 4! (A&A, discuss Season 4, Season 3 DVD, supposed surprises?)
*8:30 – 10:30: Screening of Superman Doomsday


FRIDAY, JULY 27TH
*10:30 – 12:00: Warner Bros. Film Previews (The Invasion, One Missed Call, Whiteout, Speed Racer, Get Smart (with Steve Carell), Trick ‘R Treat, Watchmen)
* 12:15 – 2:00: 20th Century Fox Previews (Jumper, Aliens Vs. Predator, Hitman, Babylon AD, The Dark Is Rising, City of Ember)
*2:30 – 4:00: Dimension Films Previews (Rob Zombie’s Halloween and Stephen King’s The Mist)
*5:00 – 6:00: 30 Year Star Wars Celebration
*9:15 – 10:15: Worst Cartoons Ever
*10:15 – 12:15: Spike And Mike’s Twisted Cartoon Gauntlet


SATURDAY, JULY 28TH
*9:15 – 10:15: Pushing Daisies Screening
*10:45 – 12:00: The Simpsons Panel!!!!
*12:00 - 12:30: Roundtable Interview with Milo Ventimiglia
*12:45 – 2:00: Heroes Presentation with Full Cast
*2:30 – 3:30: LOST Fan Summit
*3:30 – 4:30: FUTURAMA!
*3:45 – 4:00: Interviewing TheFilmCrew (Mystery Science Theatre 3000)
*5:45 – 7:00: THE RETURN OF MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATRE 3000!!!!
*7:45 – 8:45: The Sarah Silverman Show

As if that's not already enough awesome-ness for you to handle, I will be blogging LIVE throughout most of the panels! (Definitely for JJ Abrams, LOST, and Heroes!) I'll also be uploading on-the-spot interviews, images, and sounds of the long weekend as it's happening. (God bless wireless.)

What's the best way to stay on top of everything? Subscribe to my RSS Feeds!

Blogs
Videos

And you can easily check my page for all the new photos I'll be sharing with you.

This is going to rule. So much.

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON???


There's no explanation for the video besides this:

Zookeepers Chase Fake Orangutan

Event Draws Hundreds Of Spectators

Zookeepers chase a man dressed in a brightly colored orangutan costume.

I'M LOST.

Since I've posted AIM conversations in the past that gloriously embarrass another person, it's only fair that I treat myself the same way.


WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?

I know this won't get more comments than the current Petestravaganza going on. But realize that the US may have possibly begun to initiate the scariest event in our lifetime.

My fellow co-worker and blogger extraordinaire Conrad sent me this just a few minutes ago and I got sick to my stomach.

Not familiar with radio waves? Not even the tiniest bit sure what that article even says? I shall quote Conrad's LiveJournal for clarification:

"The short version, for those who TL;DR or aren't interested in radio geekery: the transmissions being heard indicate either an unusually large exercise, or preparations for war."

I have goosebumps right now. And not the good kind.

Holy goddamn hell. PLEASE NO. Please do not go to war with Iran.

I have never been so shocked by a celebrity news item in years.

Pete Wentz and Ashley Simpson are having a kid. (They're engaged too. WOOO marriage!)

I don't know what's more odd: The thought of two people I've actually met having a child or how bizarrely fascinated I am with this.

I'll go with option #2.

PopCrunch reports that "Fall Out Boy rocker Pete Wentz got engaged just before the band [played] at last Saturday’s New York’s Live Earth concert and are currently expecting a baby!"



They're having children, guys.

EDIT: Also, I can't find a program that will merge their faces so I can predict what their child will  look like. Someone help me.

Really. But the concern that a lot of you have expressed truly makes me feel fantastic. Seriously. Endless thanks.

I'm working hard on our video project. It takes up my entire day, save for when I make links for Buzznet Originals and QOTD. Some of you who have chatted with me on AIM or emailed me know this.

Anyway, I'm getting down to the end of it and I expect to be the fully-insane blogger I love being. Fear not! I have about 10 video blogs already recorded; they just need a bit of tweaking in iMovie. Ever wanted to see the raddest cemetery on the planet? Griffith Park? Fun bus adventures? Crucial bikeage? All shall be shown.

I'll also take this time to announce two new developments:

1) In just over a week's time, Buzznet (ME!!!!) will be instituting a complete takeover of Comic-Con International in San Diego, California. That's right: I will embrace the complete nerd that I am and provide LIVE BLOGGING!!!!!! I'm so excited to try this out. I will keep all you LOSTIES updated each minute on all the mind-bending revelations I'll hear. I'll also post my tentative schedule tomorrow as well.

2) Because Buzznet is ever-expanding, my whole support job has somewhat spiraled out of control. I take pride in the fact that I try to respond to every email, private message, note, and inquiry. I want to provide each and every one of you with the best help I can give. Since I've become so busy, I feel that I am greatly lacking in that area.

Never fear! To help with Buzznet Support, I've asked my friend Richard to join us here at Buzznet to take on the beast of support. This doesn't mean that I won't still answer your emails! I'll just have another entity helping me out. (This also means the Help Forum will ALWAYS have answered threads.)

Send him some welcome notices. Add him as a friend. Harass him about his love for Nine Inch Nails. (Seriously. I thought I was a huge NIN fan.) He's nice, smart, and 100 times more organized than I could ever hope to be.

Anyway, I wanted to give y'all an update about my world and some things going on here at Buzznet. Expect many more of these and more exciting news in the near future!

Seriously.

Let me know what you think about the design. I think it's smoother and less choppy.

Discuss.

But MxPx's newest album, Secret Weapon, is incredible.

That's right. MxPx. Did you forget about them? Because I gave up on that band in high school, right around when they started to release some of the most soul-sucking, major label drivel I've ever had the displeasure of listening.

But the full stream of their new album is available on their MySpace. And it's GREAT.

Want some great pop punk that's actually punk? This shit rips. Get on it.

PS: Sorry I've been a bit hard to reach and low on the blogging. I'm working hard on our video upgrade. :)

It is impossible for you to disagree.

You know you've wondered.....


Thank you, xkcd.

Because that dolt just wiped away Scoot Libby's prison sentence. Just like that.

WHY? WHAT MAKES HIM SO SPECIAL THAT HE DOESN'T HAVE TO SERVE TIME LIKE THE REST OF US?

Oh yeah. He's best buds with our Commander-In-Chief.

Sigh.